The Power of Love

Upon watching an episode of the Australian version of Who Do You Think You Are? which was a feature on actor and musician Cameron Daddo, a belief in the supernatural power of Love was re-ignited in my being. Cameron Daddo, 58 years of age, discovered that he had a maternal heritage of unfaltering love by a wife who followed her criminal lover from mainland Australia to Norfolk Island and down to Tasmania. On the other hand, Daddo also discovered that his paternal heritage was forged by a love story of a wife who sailed across the English channel to plead with a king for the release of her falsely accused husband.

Who Do You Think You Are Season 11 Episode 3 featuring Australian
actor and musician Cameron Daddo firstly aired on June 2, 2020.
**Photo: IMDB**

It was honestly an emotional experience witnessing the power of love to bind people together despite various adversities and uncomfortable situations. Themes such as self-sacrifice, holding on dearly to hope and having unyielding faith for a brighter outcome beamed through like a spectrum of light.

Furthermore, the British scholar, author and theologian Clive Lewis, in his 1960 book The Four Loves, categorizes Love into four main versions.
The first is storgē which is empathetic, instinctual or familial love – the love of children, parents and grandparents – as depicted in a family. It is natural as it is voluntary, emotionally stirs since it is forged by affection and familiarity; and it is also the most common version of love, as it is nearly unconditional and transcends most discriminating factors.

The second is Philia which is brotherly or camaraderie styled. It is a friendship founded over time upon common interests, values and experiences. He identifies this love in the friendship of Jonathan and David (as depicted in the Bible), and also Orestes and Pylades in Greek mythology.

The third version being erōs which Lewis specifically defined as intimate love and not so much the raw lust and sexuality; which he distinguishes as venus – relating to the Roman goddess of sex and fertility.

The Birth of Venus painting by Sandro Botticelli (Firenze 1445 – 1510) displayed in the Uffizi Gallery in Florence, Italy

After details of sexuality and the significance in spirituality, Lewis notes how Eros (or being in love) “…may urge to evil as well as good..”
(Lewis, C.S. The Four Loves. 1960. San Francisco, Harperone, 1960, p. 124)
The intense emotions fueled by this love can be illustrated in the Bible verse, “Love is as powerful as death. Love’s jealousy is as strong as the grave. Love is like a blazing fire. Love burns like a mighty flame.” (Song of Solomon 8:6)

The last version of love, as described by Lewis, is agápē or benevolent, unwavering, selfless and divine love between God and humanity.
The insane type of love that ignited the Christian Reformation and the thriving of the Christian faith under the persecution of Roman Emperor Nero. It is exemplified in the Bible verses such as , “Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God.” (1 John 4:7) and Proverbs 25:21-22 which reads, “If thine enemy be hungry, give him bread to eat; and if he be thirsty, give him water to drink: For thou shalt heap coals of fire upon his head, and the Lord shall reward thee.”

Love is such a multi-dimensional force that drives people to be passionate about someone, something or some location. It is a personal belief that, ‘Love is not just said but is expressed to someone else. It is a decision made on a momentary basis to treat someone with great respect, to sacrifice of yourself for that individual and also to safeguard that individual or persons from personal ill-thoughts, external inquisitions, and being supportive towards your lover or loved ones.’

Love is for the most part requiring massive self-sacrifice that requires you to have immense patience, personal awareness, individual development and maturity, and also focus and hope.

And lastly, the Bible describes love as ‘patient, kind, it does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonour others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.’
(1 Corinthians 13:4-8)

Whenever you have the opportunity, choose love!

Is Multi-Tasking Good for Us?

5 February 2024

Performing multiple tasks simultaneously may be harmful to our mental well-being.
**Picture: The Advot Project**

A couple of days ago, I was just about to begin cooking a meal when I realized that I needed to take my car out of the parking area and position it by the roadside as my housemate was going to park his car behind mine. In an act of providence, immediately after parking my car by the roadside, I ran back into the house and upon seeing the fry-pan heating up on the stove, I exhaled just remembering what I was in the process of doing prior to rushing outside.

In my younger years, I was fascinated with multi-tasking. It was primarily in the feat of juggling a variety of tasks simultaneously that I found quite sensational. For example, I would attempt having my laundry spin in the washing machine, while cooking lunch on the stove and place my wardrobe of clothes, towels, pillow and blankets outside to sundry.

The urge to become increasingly productive fueled my cravings in multi-tasking.
Unfortunately multi-tasking is not as super-productive as I envisioned it to be.
In a research statement published in 2020 by Dr. Kevin Madore and his team, the article states, ‘Heavier media multitasking is associated with a propensity to have attention lapses and forget…the degree to which an individual engages with multiple media types in a given media consumption hour (for example, watching television while texting)—are provocative, in part because heavier [multiple media types are] associated with reduced working memory and episodic memory even when performing a single task, possibly because of its positive relationship with failures of sustained attention and increased mind wandering..’¹

Making it even more obvious of the adverse effects of attempting multiple tasks simultaneously is explained in detail in another article released by Dr. Madore and Wagner in 2019, which states, ‘the human mind and brain lack the architecture to perform two or more tasks simultaneously…individuals almost always take longer to complete a task and do so with more errors when switching between tasks than when they stay with one task.‘ ²

Additionally, multi-tasking has been linked to chronic stress as the mind is taxed with processing and responding to a variety of information and preparation for expected objectives. There is also the dangers of engaging various media platforms which leads to decreased concentration spans and inability to distinguish between priorities.

In Fiji and in many places in the world, walking home after school and work whilst engaging media on a device (while in a public space) can lead to being robbed, assaulted, missing your stop or even being hit by an oncoming vehicle. Or even at home, where burning stoves without your supervision can extend to torching your house.
Furthermore, a significant amount of time can be wasted due to engaging multiple media streams and platforms.

With an abundance of distractions and the urge to accomplish multiple tasks and goals in a shorter period of time, it is very easy to lose sight of what and who is important and what who is not.

To conclude, I have noticed a great deal of anxiety and depression in my increased usage of social media. But this engagement of mine has been inevitable due to my great distance from family and friends. Secondly, my fear of financial deprivation and inability to attain important possessions such as my own house, clearing off my debts and other pressing issues fuels my relapse into attempting multiple tasks simultaneously.
The Bible counsels us in 1 Timothy 6:6-10, “Now godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into this world, and it is certain we can carry nothing out.
And having food and clothing, with these we shall be content. But those who desire to be rich fall into temptation and a snare, and into many foolish and harmful lusts which drown men in destruction and perdition. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil, for which some have strayed from the faith in their greediness, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows.“

The bottom line is there needs to be a balance between ambition and satisfaction with current progress. We also need to value and appreciate the special people in our lives and never forfeit the time and experiences spent together – for that is what fuels the social media networks – loneliness and desire to belong and be accepted.

The cravings for earning and accumulating money is instigated by the desire to afford a comfortable life for your loved ones and freedom to pursue your hobbies and other enjoyments.
But instead of focusing on what isn’t and yet to unfold, let’s not discredit and overlook what we have and who is there with us.

Stay blessed and focused dear reader!

References:
1. Madore, Kevin P., et al. “Memory Failure Predicted by Attention Lapsing and Media Multitasking.” Nature, 28 Oct. 2020, https://doi.org/10.1038/s41586-020-2870-z. Accessed 30 Oct. 2020.

2. Madore, Kevin P., and Anthony D. Wagner. “Multicosts of Multitasking.” Cerebrum: The Dana Forum on Brain Science, 1 Apr. 2019, http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7075496/.

Love conquers all

3 August, 2022

As a prelude, this article is inspired by the love story of former Prison warden Florent Goncalves and the attractive inmate Emma Arbabzadeh in the Versailles women’s prison, in France. It was then exaggerated in the French film Éperdument in 2016.

Developing a close acquaintance with someone is very powerful. Powerful in the sense of its impact on our mental health and also our physiology. A continual interaction with a complementary gender may lead to feelings of affection and a growing emotional attachment. Likewise, a growing friendship with a counterpart of the same gender may develop camaraderie and reliability. But in most situations as such, trust and familiarity springs forth. From a biological perspective, oxytocin is produced, with varying amounts, from these interactions.

Firstly, in terms of the development of an affectionate and intimate acquaintance, there may be a surge of attraction which may naturally erupt into sexual interaction. Despite how obviously fulfilling and satisfying sex appears to be, it can never be the ultimate goal of an intimate friendship. Sex in itself can not exclusively guarantee for you and your lover a durable and healthy relationship far into the future. Sexual activity should be regarded as a reward for enduring adversity together as a couple, overcoming challenges and distractions – and at the end of it still finding value and a deepened interest in each other and your relationship together.

In an age of saturation with lust and promiscuity, the act of sexual pleasure (the highest mutual activity a couple can engage in together and with each other) is cheapened and publicized as nothing more than a popular sales and marketing object.

Secondly, it would be more rewarding for couples who would like to advance their friendship to greater closeness, to consider other mutual activities such as service to the less fortunate, assisting each other in excelling in their careers, education, and learning new skills together.

Furthermore, we can find wisdom in the proverb, ‘It is better to pull the trigger when the gun is loaded in order to securely hit the target.’ Contextually, the trigger here can be sex; the loaded gun is an ever-developing relationship filled with history of surviving the adversities of life and challenges of reality together, and still being able to find value in each other and in your relationship together. The target here are your goals as a couple, and a long-lasting, healthy and satisfactory relationship.

Finally, it is naïve and immature to ignore the fact that a couple’s relationship affects their neighbours, workmates, associates, friends, relatives and family members. If a couple can consider serving their community in a positive and constructive manner, there will be widespread acceptance and support from those around you (whom you respect and consider important to you) towards your relationship as a couple.

In conclusion, I have personally come through two failed long-term relationships and these are some pointers that I have salvaged from my past romantic experiences. Sex should be used as an activity of affirmation and not used as a lustful act to smother yourselves in sweat, pleasure and vanity. Keep it special. Consider its power to bond two people together and can also becloud rational and reasonable decision making.

Have a great day! Don’t be afraid to love but be mindful that loving someone requires servitude and self-sacrifice. It’ll cost ya!

Religious Zeal

22 May, 2022

Women are highly scrutinized and demeaned in zealously religious countries such as India, Saudi Arabia and Afghanistan.
**Picture: AFP Photo/FAYEZ NURELDINE**

As I read the latest mandate by the Taliban for female Afghani news presenters to wear a veil or mask (effective as of May 21, 2022), I thought of an idiom in my native language which translates, ‘hot and cold like the corrugated iron.” I recognize the need for feminine modesty amidst a world that is very explicit and very irreverent; But, in my opinion, if the women are required to cover up in the spirit of modesty and female safety, there should be proportionate measures enforced regarding rape, pedophilia and physical assault against women in Afghanistan.

Which then brings us to the problems of religious zeal; the Bible highlights in Romans 10:1-3,
“Brethren, my heart’s desire and prayer to God for Israel is, that they might be saved. For I bear them record that they have a zeal of God, but not according to knowledge. For they being ignorant of God’s righteousness, and going about to establish their own righteousness, have not submitted themselves unto the righteousness of God.”

In the Bible text above are the dynamics of religious zeal: desiring to protest for the righteousness of God, but lacking discernment and a personal practice of these very principles in my own life. Eventually, condemning others in order to satisfy our own zeal and passion for God and his righteousness. Some Bible believers might even establish their zeal on Proverbs 27:5-6, which says, “Open rebuke is better than secret love. Faithful are the wounds of a friend; but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.” While this text might seem a worthy mantra to poke condemnation and declare “hell-fire” to the “sinners” of the world, the Bible is a complex manual that must be prayerfully considered in its entirety before drawing conclusions.

Let us consider other passages in the Bible such as John 16:7-8, which reads, “Nevertheless I tell you the truth; It is expedient for you that I go away: for if I go not away, the Comforter will not come unto you; but if I depart, I will send him unto you. And when he is come, he will reprove the world of sin, and of righteousness, and of judgment…” Here we see Jesus declaring that the Comforter, The person of the Holy Spirit will succeed Himself and do three important tasks: Reprove the world of sin, counsel in righteousness, and judgement. This is the way the God of the Bible deals with humanity’s sin problem.

(Check out my latest publication SIN and SALVATION now available)

The Holy Spirit (not any human being) eleng-ko (Strong’s Greek1651) the world of sin, meaning in the Greek, to tell a fault or identify a weakness; then He counsels in righteousness or offers practical solutions and a recovery plan; finally the Holy Spirit outlines an outcome, or a reward package that awaits our decision on whether to ignore His reproof and regress, or comply and grow as an individual (judgement).

The fragility and discretion of God’s approach when dealing with humanity’s sin is exemplified in Jesus Christ’s handling of the case of the woman caught in adultery (John 8:1-11).

The Pharisees, with a mixture of religious zeal and deceitful intentions towards Jesus, drags a young woman from the bed of her lover to the temple courts where Jesus is teaching his earnest listeners. The Pharisees, in the midst of a mumbling crowd and Jesus, lay out the charges against her and condemn her to stoning. Then they deceitfully ask Jesus what is His opinion of the matter, in order to build up evidence against Jesus. Jesus ignores the tense unfolding of events and crouches down to write with His finger in the dust of the ground. The Pharisees then grow impatient and press Jesus again for a reply to their pleading. Jesus then arises and says, “He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her.” And then He stoops down again to continue His writing in the dust of the ground.

A crowd watches as a woman is beaten by a sharia police officer dressed in black robes at a public square in Aceh, Indonesia’s only province that practices partial sharia law **(Photo Credit: Riza Lazuardi/AFP/Getty Images)**

The Bible then describes, in John 8:9, “And they which heard it, being convicted by their own conscience, went out one by one, beginning at the eldest, even unto the last: and Jesus was left alone, and the woman standing in the midst. When Jesus had lifted up himself, and saw none but the woman, he said unto her, Woman, where are those thine accusers? hath no man condemned thee? She said, No man, Lord. And Jesus said unto her, Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more.”
I would like to highlight here the clashing frontiers of CONDEMNATION and CONVICTION.

The Holy Spirit convicts our conscience, which then brings us to a point of mental awareness. On the contrary, hurtful people and religious zealots stone us to stubbornness and hard-heartedness with condemnation and a holier than thou attitude. And please note, when you read the story of the woman caught in adultery, the woman’s name is never mentioned. This is a hint to how discreet the God of heaven is towards every individual’s profile. He is not in the line of public shaming.

The Bible commentator and inspired writer Ellen G. White, in her book The Desire of Ages, concerning the woman caught in adultery, wrote, “In His act of pardoning this woman and ENCOURAGING HER TO LIVE A BETTER LIFE, the character of Jesus shines forth in the beauty of perfect righteousness. While He does not palliate sin (ignore it’s severity or seriousness), nor lessen the sense of guilt, He seeks not to condemn, but to save. The world had for this erring woman only contempt and scorn; but Jesus speaks words of comfort and hope…Those who are forward in accusing others, and zealous in bringing them to justice, are often in their own lives more guilty than they. Men hate the sinner, while they love the sin. Christ hates the sin, but loves the sinner.”
(Source: E.G. White, The Desire of Ages, Pacific Press Publishing Association: Mountain View, CA(1898), p. 462)

Finally, addressing Proverbs 27:5-6 and religious zealots, open rebuke is not equal to public shaming. In the light of John 8 and Scriptures such as Matthew 18:15 and Galatians 6:1-3, we should definitely see the importance of raising awareness of sin, in the spirit of love; but also exercise privacy, discretion, consciousness of our own personal flaws, and also offer practical solutions. And most importantly, invest our own time in assisting these individuals with reform and ENCOURAGING THEM TO LIVE A BETTER LIFE.

For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved. (John 3:17)

Check out my video about the difference between Condemnation and Conviction